Monday, 30 July 2007

New Start 27 (ii) - BBQ

Went to Martin and Shelley's for a BBQ and took packs etc. I was being good and dutiful and drinking my water and black coffee when I got too cold. When everyone else was just about to eat, I discovered that their microwave wasn't working so couldn't make soup or muffin and I hadn't brought anything else with me. I know I could have made it with the kettle or sat and eaten nothing and a few weeks ago that's what I would have done but, on Saturday night out with friends and feeling slim and happy, I just didn't want to!! It all seemed a bit artificial as the 3 other women there were all heavier than me and not dieting so it seemed strnage me making a big thing about sticking to my diet while they ate....crooked thinking I know but thre you go. I did go into it with my eyes open.. (Chapter 3 of the poem there Mrs!!)
So I ate real food again and enjoyed a glass of red wine. I didn't have bread or potatoes, just meat and salad (which was delicious) and refused all of the gorgeous looking cakes etc so didn't feel too bad. It has given me a taste of how I'm going to cope with eating out when I finish. It was a lovely evening too.
The trouble is - I'm not quite there even if I feel as though I am. I haven't reached my target yet and, if I don't, I know I'll regret it forever and all this eating/cheating is merely delaying my getting there. So, much as I am enjoying myself and not really beating myself up about the eating/cheating, it is a pain and I must get back to dieting ways again.
So, after a pretty ropey weekend foodwise, I'll be back on track come Monday!! And jogging like a mad thing!!


chrismars said...

At least you went in with your eyes open - and kept close enough to the 80/20 rule by being mindful and keeping away from the gooey cakes and desserts.

You're going to have to eat 'proper' food eventually, so this is a gradual beginning.

You look happy in the photo and that's the main thing.

Chris x

Anonymous said...

Just caught up! What a difference in the garden photos & well done for speaking up the the meeting; go girl!!! Keep us updated re payrise - very exciting! What a mare to have a chocolate teapot boss! Hopeless! Stop the cheating now - sooner you stop; sooner you NEVER have to have a pack again! Think of it as a sprint to the finish line perhaps! You SOOO can do it! Big hugs! Love the doggie jumping/playing action shots BTW!! Labs & springers & my fave hounds so two in the same shot a bonus!! Also very funy/romantic re being carried up the stairs by D...bless him - you sound a bit closer the last few days?