Midsummer evening

Midsummer evening

Thursday, 28 May 2009

Colours of Mary's Garden!

After Nellie's garden, tonight it's the turn of the flowers in my mother's garden in Lincolnshire. You could vote for your favourite if you like! Some sort of papery hydrangea I think...I love the big flowers and muted, old-fashioned colour.


A flag iris
Oh God - one of those bedding flowers which is in EVERY garden - petunia?? Stunning colour though, donchathink?

Gentlemens' Button I believe.
A common or garden iris, slightly on the wane but gorgeous nonetheless.

Lupins!!

More lupins!

Yernnnerner!! (roughly translated as "no idea" while shrugging)

Lilac, definitely.

Lupins (again)

Wisteria, so lovely and olde englishe.

More lilac
Dunno - very pretty and springlike though. I have one but it doesn't flower nearly as nicely as mum's.

In order to save myself time but still post, I thought I'd cut and paste this evening's email to the TV psych guy into the blog. Initially we had to email him every night with our weight and exercise etc to make sure we stayed on the straight and narrow. He has relaxed that requirement now down to 2 or 3 times per week but I still find nightly emails useful and, as I'm used to posting often, it's not a hardship. The format of my emails has become somewhat formulaic so I won't post them here too often but I thought tonight's one was a reasonable snapshot of the sort of thing he gets.


Another busy day. But a good one.

weight - 14 stone dead. Aaaargh, it's 4 steps forward, 2 steps back. Still, I'm going to have faith and trust that I'm doing the right thing.

exercise - a 45 minute hilly run this evening when I got back from my french class at 8pm. I was most definitely multi-tasking today - running, speaking french and coaching my chimp all at the same time! Ie. I was chatting to my chimp in french all the way round which was strange but entertaining. Not sure what

food - good. I've not really thought about it today, which I like. I've not been particularly tempted, just eaten when I was hungry, what I'd planned to eat and not agonised about it. Very relaxing.

head - pretty good too. A brief pang this morning when I stood on the scales but talked myself round and told myself not to be derailed.


Not much to report really apart from that I'm still very motivated and feeling good. I felt very strong on my run this evening and didn't worry about the hill which I'd had to force myself up only last week, just powered on up it.

Very excited about our holiday in Botswana in September which I have nearly finalised and booked. I'm already using it as a motivational tool. I really want to be slender and fit for that holiday so that I look great in the pics, can wear nice clothes and feel fit and healthy on some of the more adventurous activities. Don't want to be fat girl on the quad bikes across the salt pans or get mistaken for a hippo out in the Okavango delta!! (joke - I promise!).

When we were in South Africa last October, I did a bungee jump off the Bloukhrans Bridge which is the highest commercial bungee in the world. I absolutely loved it but remember being a bit gutted that they wrote my weight in black felt pen on my hand (it was 95kg) and that in the video, I looked quite chunky, especially when my t-shirt rode up as I hung upside down!!

There is bungee off the bridge near Victoria Falls where we are going and I would love to do that and this time look svelte and have a much smaller number written on the back of my hand. I am already down to 88kg. Something in the mid 70's would be nice! Then, instead of a baggy mens' souvenir t-shirt, I would buy a slinky girls' cut t-shirt and wear it with pride!

What have I changed today?

Not much. I'm talking to myself a lot about what I'm going to do about food and exercise and just generally gee-ing me and the chimp along. It helped this afternoon before my french class. I usually stop at a service station and just have a quick half hour rest between work and french and in the past would buy a cappucino and muffin. Today, still stopped, which felt like a risk, but only had a cup of tea and no snack. Talked myself through the whole process in advance so I didn't get tempted by "the usual" and was ready with some of the techniques but, when it came to it, I wasn't overly tempted anyway so didn't have to use them. This despite the fact that that woman behind the counter recognised me and asked if I wanted my usual order....!



Anyway, bed is calling me - night all!!

Wednesday, 27 May 2009

Only 8 weeks to go!!!

The colours of Nellie's garden (that's my mother-in-law in Ireland by the way)

I went out on the one sunny day and snapped this lot - don't know what half of them are (below is definitely apple blossom) but they were beautiful.

Heather....see I told you I was not a gardener..

Some sort of azalea??



shrugs...

no idea but gorgeous with the sun behind (I'm a better photographer than gardener)


Clematis (montana?)




I hadn't realised just how quickly this TV programme was passing. We had our second weighing, measuring and time trial last night, 4 weeks after the first so it was our first opportunity to see how we are getting on against objective standards. I'm not going to go into the exact measurements as I don't want to spoil the programme etc but I can reveal that I have lost a reasonable amount of weight; shrunk in centimetres; lost a good amount of fat from the skinfold test sites and got faster in the 1km time trial round the velodrome.


So all good except I think we all felt we could have done a little bit better. It has taken time for us to find our feet and really knuckle down to the programme.


The psych, cycling coach, fitness instructor and the strength and conditioning coach were all there last night and they were all pushing the mesage that we have to really "bring it" now. We have only 8 weeks to go until our final time trial and measurements and we need to make sure that we don't leave anything in the tank.


It was very inspiring and upbeat, not judgmental or negative at all. The psych told us not to dwell on disappointment but to learn from it, which is obvious when you think about it! We realised that we have not met the "olympic" standard of dieting as yet but at least we now know what we are aiming for and we've all had a taste of sucess to prime the pump.


The time trial was amazing. I was the fastest to start with and I'm still the fastest now but one of the other women is catching me fast. The pressure was on and I was determined not to have anything left when I finished. The psych guy shouted at me as I flew by "you've got all night to recover - go for it" and that spurred me on. I felt as though I was flying round the track (although in reality I'm sure I was pretty pedestrian) and it was a great feeling to be lung-burstingly knackered at the end. I was wimpering as I sailed round my slowdown lap but I knew I had given everything.


One of the women was quite emotional about it. I realised that it is pretty rare for grown up women to really push themselves in a physical arena (other than childbirth of course!) and it is a wonderful feeling to find out what your body can do. I know I'm pretty active etc and do walks and even runs but, even so, I don't habitually sprint, flat-out, just for the hell of it. Maybe I should. It's a great feeling.


And having a team of people shouting and cheering on the sidelines and the coaches getting so hyped up by our improvements was great too. I understand that for elite athletes, improvements from their heady heights are measured in tenths of seconds but for us it was several seconds so I think they got a bit over-excited!


One downside is that I haven't got much time so I hope you'll forgive me for not posting as often but I'm really devoting a lot of time to this thing. For example, I'm not long back from work but I've already tidied up, done some home admin, fed the dogs and the birds, recorded a brief video diary, done this post and am about to get changed and go for a run then do a strength and conditioning workout while watching the Champions League Final.



Then I'll think about supper - I've got some homemade soup in the fridge which needs eating so that'll do. Food - it's just fuel to me now!!! he he


Hope you're all getting on well - keep it up and keep those pesky chimps in order!!

Friday, 22 May 2009

She fooled me!

Some lovely birdys from my feeders in the sunshine yesterday. A humble sparrow but still very beautiful and sleek, love the colour scheme.
A handsome jackdaw. The way the sun catches the sheen on his feathers is perfect; took my breath away.
A glossy starling, yet another ordinary but extraordinary bird.

And finally the mysterious nuthatch. I love his tree-creeping ways and his bandit's eye mask!

My chimp that is. I've been happly thinking that I was doing okay and that Ireland had only set me back a week etc etc when the Psych bloke came round for an in-depth chat on Wednesday day evening. He showed me (very nicely and non-judgmentally) that that was a load of bull. I was the same weight on Monday as I was on 3 May! In the interim period I had lost 3lbs but then re-gained it so I had effectively wasted over 2 weeks. And I hadn't noticed.


He explained that my chimp is a sneaky bitch and does all sorts of things to feel safe and secure and one of those is fooling me into thinking that I'm on track even when I've relaxed the regime which means she gets more food.


Cow!


I was a bit blindsided by this but he said, don't fall into anger and frustration; choose a different response which will serve you better. So I have - determination.


So, over the last couple of days I've been much more focussed and have used some of the techniques he's given me to good effect.


What are these, you might be saying?


Well, one I found useful is asking myself whether I would still eat the item or not do the exercise if someone was giving me £1million for losing weight at the end of the competition. The answer is invariably "no" which helps you decide whether you really need the food or rest or whether it's just your chimp whinging because she's afraid she can't do it.



Another, which is more about procrastination than not eating, is the phrase "if you've got to eat a frog, don't look at it first". That has really helped me get stuck into to work projects that I might otherwise avoid or put off. And, as we all know, once you're in control of work/life stuff, it's a lot easier to control food and exrecise.


Another is to talk aloud to my chimp, laugh at her. So, instead of getting upset about temptation, I crack a smile and say (often out loud) "oh, give over you greedy cow, we don't need it, you're just pushing your luck" or something similar. I acknowledge that she's not in control of me and poke fun at her for wanting to stuff her face. She tends to subside then!


Another one is to embarass her; make it clear to someone else that you're not going to eat and she will be too proud to give in. So, say at a party or work buffet, say to the boss "I'm not eating because I'm not hungry and I'm going out tonight" or something similar. Then she will help you not eat rather than lose face.


Anyway, that's enough for now as have to dash off to work and eat some more frogs!!

Saturday, 16 May 2009

Rainy day blues

Some pics from the sunny graveyard I mentioned a couple of posts ago. It really was beautiful, so peaceful and ancient feeling. The evening sun thorugh the trees onto the flowers was heavenly too.

Minty takes a break.

Bluebells in the sunshine.

This used to be the view from D's bedroom window when he was a lad. To the left is Vinegar Hilland on the right is St Senans which is the local psychiatric hospital. The story is that the plans for the hospital got mixed up with those for an Indian prince's palace back in Victorian times. It's certainly an impressive building.

Sunshine on a horse chestnut blossom - do they call them Roman Candles or something?

It has been a tricky day, rainy and cold so difficult to fill. Luckily I had pushed D and his brother into booking a quad biking session for us all so at least we had one outing. That was a good laugh; cold and muddy but who cares when you're wearing waterproof overalls and wellies?! I really enjoyed speeding round a technical course in a muddy field trying to keep up with D.

To be honest though, I've struggled with feeling grumpy today. Not sure why. D and I had a really good chat last night but today everything seemed so annoying. Probably me then! Maybe it's the crowd in the house. There are 9 adults and 3 dogs all sharing a smallish house and it is a little claustrophobic. I don't do brilliantly well with crowds, especially when they are all stuffing their faces and I'm not. No tart, strawberries and cream, pavlova, profiteroles, roast potatoes....grrr



I wouldn't mind but even with that restraint, I still ate way more than I should have done. The Psych bloke emailed me last night and really put me straight; reminded me that I'm being weighed (on national TV) a week on Tuesday so I should really be pushing hard now. I doubt I'll have lost anything this week but I don't think I've gained either so that is a victory. I'll go hell for leather when we get back.

I think the Irish way is a little grating on my buttoned up English sensitivities after a full week....it's based around incessant piss taking and constant talking. Everything is dissected and decisions take forever to make. It takes about 2 hours to actually DO anything. I can manage for a few days but then start to get ratty. God, I sound like a real misery guts don't I? It's really not that bad but I'm using this blog to express all the things that I can't say to anyone here...I may be grumpy but I'm not rude!!

It helps if I can get out and about to exercise but today I only had a short run because poor old Minty cut her paw on some glass in the road and I had to limp her home. We've just been out for a brisk 3 mile walk though and I do feel better. Tomorrow, I'm going to go for a long bike ride first thing in the morning....8 miles at least!

Anyway, thanks for listening, I feel much calmer now.

Friday, 15 May 2009

Getting harder....

The dogs snuffling round the beach on Tuesday.

I'll have a big white one please...


As the holiday week in Ireland goes on, I can feel my resolve to resist delicious food weakening. It starts with a few bites of potato salad then a nibble of apple tart, a splodge of coleslaw and before you know it, you're chowing down on a plate full of pavlova!!


Well, I'm not there yet but I could see the warning signs today so I've had to have a stern talk to myself.

I went for my usual 6 mile hilly bike ride this morning and then a 5 mile walk with the family along the beach and back this afternoon so the exercise has been good at least.

We're having a great time and have taken loads of great photos so all is well as long as I don't weaken. Tonight, for the first time, I want to have a drink too. Will see how it goes and limit it to a couple. Wish me luck.

Thursday, 14 May 2009

Tough times

We went down to a pretty little harbour town called Kilmore Quay on Tuesday and had a poke around the beach and the headland. Gorgeous weather and very scenic. The dogs were in heaven.

The headland was covered in this lovely pink flower, no idea what it is but beautiful.
One of the many rock pools we were investigating...took me back to my childhood in Cornwall.

Shelagh dips her toe in the water. Minty not interested.


But we're having a good time. The tough times are me trying NOT to eat all the lush food served up by my mother in law. I've set a few rules - I don't have any potatoes; no bread; no tart or pavlova and nothing fried. That still leaves a huge number of tempations.

In fact I've had bread once and a potato once as well but I've not been too bad. I've also managed a run or a bike ride and an evening walk with Nellie every day so far and I've only had 2 glasses of wine all week. So, there's more positives than negatives but I'm having to be constantly vigilant. I doubt I'll lose weight this week but, if I get home without having piled it on, that'll be a first.

We had one gorgeous sunny day on Tuesday and since then it has been cold and rainy. We're having fun but it does make it harder to keep busy. We were hoping to go to Glendalough in Wicklow tomorrow but I don't think it'll be worth the drive in this weather. Instead, we're hoping to go for a long walk along the beach but I'm watching the weather now which is giving rain and more rain....sigh...

The weekend should be a laugh - D's sister and her husband are coming up from Cork and his brother's English girlfriend is flying in for the weekend so there'll be a house full. We're going quad biking on the Saturday so that's something the weather can't ruin.

Anyway, that's all for now. Hope you're all having a good week and are being good. Kiss kiss.

Tuesday, 12 May 2009

In auld Oirreland...

I haven't got any new photos from this trip but found these on my mother in law's computer from a previous trip.



Thanks for all your lovely comments. It really makes a huge difference to have a support network.

But, having said that, one does tend to get an unbalanced picture from a blog. After all, we post about the things that are at the top of the list for us but that doesn't necessarily show the whole picture. D has been incredibly understanding and supportive in certain ways and at certain very important times and we do have a good time together often.

Anyway, on that overly serious note, to an update. We're in Ireland with the inlaws at the mo. It's sunny and we're just mooching around. I want to do more and D has picked up the hint (can't really stand sitting around bullshitting for too long). So, we're going to have lunch then head off to the coast in the sunshine. We'll take the dogs and a camera so no doubt you'll see what we've been up to before long.

I've been stellar on the exercise front. It's not hard when you're on holiday and the sun is shining! I went for a run yesterday afternoon - I haven't been running for weeks. I was aiming for the short circuit of 3 miles but got the bug so did the full 5 miles which was, I swear, ALL up hill!! I ran very slowly but didn't stop once so I'm very proud of myself.

I also went for a brisk 3 mile walk with my mother in law, Nellie. She goes out nearly every evening and it 's lovely to join her. We catch up with the family news and put the world to rights. You'll have noticed the difference I'm sure...

Right, lunch (gorgeous smelling home made vegetable soup and home made Irish brown bread....drooooolll) is ready so I'll fare thee well for now.




Later: We've had a great day out. The weather has been just lovely. We went to the coast and poked around on the rocks and the beach. Very relaxing. Then this evening I took the dogs for a walk and ended up in an old Anglo-Irish graveyard. It's walled and almsot totally overgrown. Very historic, there's an old Nationalist freedom fighter's grave there which the remnants of the IRA still visit and leave a wreath on. It seems ironic because some of the other old graves are very anti-Irish!
I found one this evening, which I remembered from years ago, barely legible now, but it remembers a John who was "fouly murdered" by the Rebel Pikemen on Vinegar Hill in the rising of 1798. Vinegar Hill in Enniscorthy was the site of the biggest rising in that year and it was where the rebels were finally overcome. Shame, but we English were bad bastards back then, a fact I'm seldom allowed to forget!
It was stunning this evening - wooded and filled with bluebells, wild garlic and other flora. the sun slanting through the fresh green leaves and the ivy crawling all over the gravestones. I took masses of photos but can't upload them as I've left my card reader at home! Gorgeous though. I'll try and get them onto a CD in town tomorrow. Anyway, I'm off to the pub now so night night all.

Sunday, 10 May 2009

Cream crackered

I haven't taken many pics recently but I spotted this little wabbit from the window yesterday...I don't have a veggie garden so I'm not going to be tooo concerned about this chap and his pal in my garden (yet!).

It was a bit overcast so the pics (taken on a long lense from the upstairs window) are not the greatest).





I've just got back from the track after over 5 hours (plus an hour's drive each way) filming session. It's only 3pm but I could go to bed! Still, it was good and we learned so much.



First up was the bike stuff. We had a different trainer this time - an English guy called Tim who works mainly with children trying to get them hooked on cycling. He was a big contrast to the Aussie, Shane, who works full time with elite athletes. Initially I preferred the Shane approach - all shouting, enthusiasm and leaping in. It appealed to my competitive nature. After a while though, I realised that, although I was occasionally frustrated by the talky, softly softly Tim approach, I was learning a lot more about the bike and how to control it.



So overall, it was a good thing to see a different route.



The time trial was hard, quck but hard. It's only 1km which is 4 times round the track but you are pushing yourself to the limit all the way so lungs were bursting and legs shaking at the end. It was about setting personal targets as a benchmark for future improvement. But, I was secretly very satisifed to be the fastest by a decent margin....and my chimp will help me work hard to maintain that position too!



I did it in 1 minute 41 and other times were 1.46, 1.56 and 2.01. We now have a team target to collectively improve so we will have to work together.



We also did several skill sessions - learning how to control the bike at slow speed (not so easy when you feet are clipped in and you don't have any brakes!); standing starts and track technique. I must admit that I'm surprised how much there is going on on the track which I didn't appreciate when I sat and watched all those Golds at the Olympics. I, in my ignorance, thought that it was mostly about how fit and strong the respective cyclists were!



Interspersed with these sessions, we had our first one-to-one with the Psych bloke. It was a bit nerve racking, especially as I had quite a few issue to discuss of a personal nature. But he helped out by asking that the first interviews not be filmed so that we could just chat to him in confidence. We didn't have much time but he has given me some important insights already.



His theory is that, if you can keep your inner chimp happy and nurtured, she will leave you alone and then you can get on doing the stuff YOU want to do. So, my homework for the next few weeks is trying to work out MY needs and my chimp's needs so that we can work out a plan to satisfy both without conflict (which leads to unhappiness, fear, food and procrastination).



I appreciate that this theory stuff is quite complicated but, unfortunately, I've been a bit constrained from going into too much detail as it is the intellectual property of the Psych guy. I'm sure that, in the fullness of time, I'll be able to be a bit more candid.



We talked almost entirely about D and I and our recent travails. He explained that there are 3 different regimes operating in my head - me, my chimp and my gremlins. I can identify and try to satisfy/control my chimp but I can't remove her. I can identify my gremlins (unhelpful learned beliefs and behaviours) and remove them (although I must replace them with something else to operate under). But first I need to do as much work as possible to get to know my chimp and identify my gremlins.



One of themfor example, which explains a lot, is my belief that Diarmuid should (a very significant word there) support me in my endeavours. This is my belief, not Diarmuid's. When he does not, I feel threatened, upset, let down and then my emotional side (my chimp) takes over and pushes me into an inappropriate response, which in trun escalates the situation with D.
So, if D does not support me, there is no point in getting upset about it, I need to decide how to cope to give my chimp the reassurance she needs possibly from a different support network. If, after logical and rational assessment, I see that I don;t get anything I need from D, or not enough, well that is a different decision for me to take but it is not one for the chimp to make based on emotion and fear. It all sounds very epochal and I assure you it is not necessarily so, just an example of how me and my chimp are currently manufacturing arguments and tensions which we need not have. (Which is not to say that D isn't responsible too, just the effects need not be as harmful as they have been.)



He made it sound so simple but I'm sure it's not. Worth working at though. It made me realise that, however much soul searching I think I've done and however much I've learned on this dieting and personal development journey so far, there is a huge way to go still.



But I've got you lot for company so what's the rush?

Friday, 8 May 2009

Soldiering on

Me, Minty and Andrew being guinea pigs for my niece's new found interest in photography...




I had a great time on Tuesday doing the filming. The film crew came to my house in the afternoon to do some interviews and background stuff with me which was interesting. It's amazing how quickly you get used to being filmed. I felt relaxed and happy chatting away and being filmed doing "normal" things like coming home from work, cycling on the static bike and looking in my fridge and cupboards. All totally staged of course.


I had been well prepped by the kind Mrs L so I had prepared a little bit to make sure I got across the most important things I wanted to say and I think I managed it. I talked about the blog and the incredible supportive little community we have here which they seemed really interested in.


In fact they wanted a shot of me supposedly "blogging" so I had to change into my work clothes (obviously as I'm a solicitor I wear a smart suit all the time in Telly World - lol!!) and tap away at the computer. It was exceedingly fake but the dogs enjoyed their moment of fame. In fact I was sending an email to my friend telling him that I was being filmed while I typed - I thought it would look more realistic.


After a few hours of that we went over to the Velodrome for our first session on the track. It was strangely nerve-wracking. The bikes don't have gears or brakes and my feet were clipped in so I felt very unsteady. But, they took it slowly and after a few laps I was getting the hang of it. I was the fastest of the 4 of us which I have to admit pleased the sporty, competitive side to my nature. I found it exhilerating and quite addictive.


The banking round the bends is pretty steep though so you have to keep concentrating all the way round! I got about 3/4 of the way up it but the top looks very high. We're being filmed on the track again on Sunday morning for our 1km time trial which will be a killer. You'd think that 4 times round the track is not far but, flat out, it's exhausting.




In fact the pressure is already starting to tell - this evening I would have preferred getting on the bike straight away when I got home and then eating but, no - eat then pub. So now I feel full and don't want to go on the bike. I also feel less motivated than I did....alll the demoralising picking becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy. I'm not going to let it happen though - the minute I finish this post I'm down to the bike for at least 30 minutes hard graft....I promise.


So - I feel a little down, I'm more pissed off actually and determined to make this stick and learn learn learn. I don't want to keep on struggling forever.

Thursday, 7 May 2009

Quick update

I'm struggling to get to the computer to post as I'm so busy at the moment. It's all bike, work, Diarmuid, chores, dogs. I will try and make time tonight.

Anyway, just to let you know that I'm getting on really well with the programme. I seem to have found a happy medium foodwise (roughly: muesli and fruit for breakfast; sushi or salad and yoghurt for lunch; fuit for snacks and meat/fish and salad or veggies for supper). I haven't had any bread for well over a week now and hardly any potatoes. I occasionally have a veggie pasta evening meal. Seems to work so far.

I've lost 7 or 8 lbs and I'm feeling a lot fitter.

I'm still doing my personal training twice a week but now adding 4 or 5 sessions on the static bike as well as my big walks and a couple of home workouts for strength and conditioning. Sounds like a lot but the static bike at home means I can fit in 30 minutes on the bike in the evening while watching telly a lot easier than going to the gym or for a run. No excuses.

On the head side of things, we talked through the "beer before the game" angst from last Sunday and I think it was okay. My chimp seems to be biding her time at the mo so no major temptations. I'm vigilant though.

Gotta go - more later.

Monday, 4 May 2009

A bit blah

My niece Liz and her boyfriend Andrew came up to visit me for a couple of days over the weekend and we went for a walk in the Upper Derwent Valley. Aint young love grand??


They're very sweet together.....takes me back.

Shelagh enjoying her dip.

Me and Liz. She looks so like my sister at her age.
It was a very steep hill, even the dogs were taking it steady.

But worth it for the views and the young 'uns were definitely not used to the hills, I was striding ahead!! Tee hee..


Minty Moo or whatever we're calling her these days.

Once on top, you feel as though you're on top of the world - not a sign of civilisation for miles.

And then back down to the reservoir via an unauthorised route. (We took a wrong turn and couldn't face hiking back up the hill to regain the path so snuck through a field feeling very guilty - but we weren't busted by the farmer so all was wel!!)


I've had a very quiet day today. Nothing planned and just the rain for company. I usually intend, on days such as these, to do LOADS of chores and gets through masses of my "to do" list. But today I decided just to set myself a couple of tasks and then to take it easy.


So, I managed to achieve my (admittedly low) goals but was still feeling somewhat uninspired by about 6 o'clock. Also, my chimp had been taking advantage of the peace and quiet to make her feelings known. She had a much more interesting agenda for the evening than mine which involved bread, ice cream, maybe even biscuits if I had given in to her in Sainsburys this afternoon!! She and I had a pleasant but meaningful chat and, apart from a couple of pears and a well timed cup of tea, we emerged unscathed and unfed.


By 6pm my choice was clear: settled into the sofa; feel crap and flat like I did last weekend. Or, get off my backside and move. Learning from experience, I chose the latter and went for a walk in the drizzle. At first it was cold and I fully intended to just charge round the block, especially as my trainers had let in the wet so my feet were cold. But then I started to enjoy myself and as I charged around lost myself in daydreams and little stories (not telling you what they were about though!!). So I added first one loop and then another to my route until I had walked for well over an hour and emerged into the light through the clouds of my fug.


When I got back I was up for more chores and even mopped the kitchen floor which is one of my least favourite tasks (and had not even been on my list!).


I've got training first thing tomorrow morning and then I'm not going into work as I'm being filmed at home for the first time. After filming I'll have to follow the crew across to Manchester for our next evening session so it'll be a busy day. I'm glad I've had a quiet day today and I'm glad I didn't listen to "her" and buy those biscuits!!


Hope you all had a great Bank Holiday and I'll check in tomorrow or Wednesday with my next report from the Velodrome.