Thursday 8 September 2011

On the Edge....and my Chimp is standing behind me pushing!!

Oh yes, here I am, teetering on the brink of sabotaging my success. It's as if a switch was flicked once I officially hit the half stone mark which enabled me to forget about the dieting rules which have led me to that success. My chimp is well and truly on a roll with the justificatory excuses and false rationalisations. And I fell for at least part of it!


Take yesterday (Wednesday) the day after my weigh-in: I was working from home so the usual work routines were not in place. Not only that but I was not playing golf in the morning. It was a foul and rainy day and my workload was boring. And I ate more than I should have done and didn't do the exercise I had planned. (This sounds like the confession from the C of E order of service...) It started with toast. I came down in the morning to smell Rich's toast (he usually has breakfast at work so this is out of the ordinary). I immediately thought "I could have toast for breakfast" and did. Without really thinking it through. Of course I CAN have toast for breakfast on the SW plan but you do have to be a bit careful and I have been trying to avoid bread where possible, have it as an occasional treat or emergency measure.


Hey ho, so far, so not-so-bad. Nothing bad through the morning, just teas and coffees and fruit snacks. Lunch was some leftover rice with veggies and a couple of slices of bacon, all fine. And then....PIE!


The curse of leftovers again. Fruit pie from last week which I should have thrown away as Rich has not been interested in finishing it off. I did throw it out, right into my stomach along with a slug of double cream to wash it down. Pure chimp-induced impulse. And I bet I wouldn't have done it if I'd either played golf in the morning or not had the toast. It was as though the chink of daylight let in by the toast and not exercising, allowed her to get her meaty shoulder into the fridge and find something bad.....aaah, what have we here??.....PIE!!


I suppose the good thing is that I didn't then go on to compound the mistake too badly. Despite my chimp being frantic with sugar-fuelled excitement, I resisted biscuits and more toast and cooked a SW compliant supper (of which more later). I actually got so far as taking the lid off the biscuit tin before shoving it away. I was hunting round the kitchen for nameless "somethings". But, I did stop the rot, sort of. I did have one biscuit after supper because Rich brought it through with his dessert. I could have said no ta but I didn't. Oh, and a small glass of wine with my friend Vicky later. Which I'd always planned on.


Exercise wise, I had been intending to go for a run. Somehow the intermittent heavy rain showers put me off that idea. That and the boring day and off-piste eating. In the end I went for an intentionally brisk 45 minute dog walk and that is IT.


Not great but better than I thought it was going to be. So - it wasn't a great day but it wasn't a terrible one. And as long as I learn from it how to do better next time and don't let it carry on into the rest of this week, it's unlikely that much harm will have been done.


To that end, what have I learned?


Working from home is potentially dangerous. It has hitherto been fine when I have been up and onto the golf course but, with the advent of autumn and winter soon to follow, this will not always be possible. I think I should sort out some exercise early in the day rather than heading straight from bed to desk. This would wake me up (a bit like the morning commute) and set me on the right track. It would also minimise the chimp's "persuasion" time. Failing that, I need to research some sort of class to commit to on a Wedneday. I have just sent a text to my personal trainer to see if he can suggest something. I seem to recall that he used to do a pilates class on a Wednesday, maybe he still does...


It's all about planning for me. Our SW leader has a wealth of sayings and this one has hit home for me: "You don't plan to fail, but you can fail to plan". If I fail to plan, I often fall flat on my face.


Re food in the fridge, I do NOT need to save everything. I was raised by parents who were brought up during the Second World War and hence remember rationing vividly. Everything was saved and put in the fridge to be recycled later. Now, I'm all for leftovers but only where they're going to be sensibly incorporated into a tasty and healthy meal. NOT where they sit in the fridge causing needless temptation and end up being "finished off" as a pointless extra. I need to lose the WWII mindset and only save what I need. If Rich is not going to eat the pie, then chuck it out. It was only one (generous) slice out of a large pie, not wholesale wastage.


So, although it wasn't a great day, I hope that I have gleaned something useful from it. I was at training first thing this morning and back on the straight and narrow with a healthy breakfast and fruit snacks in the morning.


One thing I did notice this morning though was how active my chimp was. She tried to talk me into having a McDonalds cappucino on my drive in - "it's only 120 calories, you haven't had one in ages, it'd only be this morning, you REALLY want one today, more than usual....". I recognised the wheedling for what it was and drove past. Then in the office, I was STARVING....ravenous for snacks. Repeatedly peering at the snack table where there is STILL chocolate fudge cake (must be a bit dry by now!). I resisted and sent a text to Rich saying how hungry I was which seemed to take the sting out of it. I intended to a jacket spud and beans for lunch to assuage the hunger as I knew I was going to french after work so would be eating late but was thwarted 'cos the cafe "did not have beans"! How is this possible? Ended up having a salad and bag of popcorn from Boots (only 80 cals but very salty).


And it worked....but I was definitely on the edge. If I hadn't had the tools which Steve Peters taught us as part of that long ago TV show, I think I would be tumbling by now!!

3 comments:

Seren said...

I must go back and read all the posts you wrote with regards that TV show, I bet there'd be loads of interesting stuff in there.

I think, as you say, sometimes having a slightly off piste day doesn't do any harm if it allows you to identify behaviours and patterns. And you deserve a massive pat on the back for stopping the rot before it completely took hold - that's definitely my problem (my chimp is obviously a Mastermind fan - "I've started so I'll finish...")

Sx

Peridot said...

I agree that planning is key. Sometime I get tired with the constant planning and that is absolutely the worst thing.

Popcorn? Isn't that a SW no-no? I'd appreciate any tips you're getting from classes - the only class near me was not very good.

Px

Shauna said...

Wow it is really wonderful that the ChimpWork is still with you after all this time. The ability to recognised what is going on before it spirals into diaster, that is a brilliant skill to have :) Onward, good lass! :)