Focus

I have had to.  I have had a lot on and it is only getting busier.  This is usually the time when I start to falter; when a legitimate excuse not to log, or exercise or eat well turns into a few days off, which can then turn into hiatus from diet and exercise.  Not this time.

I was in work Monday and Tuesday and managed a good run on Monday and a determined march around town on Tuesday.  Wednesday was working from home and then heading over to pick up Dad after his operation.  Work was demanding so I knew I would not be able to fit in a run but I managed a lovely walk around Hathersage before I set off.  It's a walk I don't do often and usually try to avoid in the wet as it can get very muddy but it was very uplifting on Wednesday.

You start by crossing the river Noe, running high after all the rain!

Past these magnificent chickens.They are very large and glossy black.  No idea of breed - Peridot, it's the sort of thing you usually know?? Their cockerel is a character too, strutting around bossing them all about.

You turn right up a track past the cemetary which must be one of the most scenic and peaceful resting places anywhere. Where we buried Mum is beautiful in a flat, Lincolnshire kind of way but I think this has the edge.

Even when it is wet and chilly, nature was everywhere.  The hedgerows were alive with birdlife and we must have seen a dozen squirrels.  The birds were pretty good too - all the usuals - chaffinches, goldfinches, blue, coal and great tits, sparrows, blackbirds, robins, etc but also a stunning fat thrush and a cloud of long-tailed tits.  I love them with their fluffy pink and grey feathers.

Then under the railway track.  Those Victorian architects certainly meant their work to last.

I love this view up to the lovely big house on the hill, the grand park in front with their ancient trees.

This one didn't make it through the last storm a few weeks ago.  It still looks pretty grand though.

The fenced enclosure up ahead is a small caravan park.  I'm never attracted by the idea of caravanning but, if I had to do it, I would pick a place like this. Small, quiet but within easy walking distance of the village and its pubs and shops.

Then we turn onto the fields and walk towards Mam Tor in the distance, the Shivering Mountain as it used to be called.

A nice close up of my greying temples.  I really need to book a haircut and touch up before my big performance in the Panto; I don't want people to clock how old I really am!!

Back under the railway line with a beautiful view of Hope Church beyond.

And then back to Hope with Lose Hill (makes a change from Win Hill I suppose) ahead of me all the way.

Dad was in good spirits after his operation.  He said he hadn't felt a thing, not even the local anaesthetic so that was good. He has to put drops in 10 times each day for 2 weeks and can't drive during that time but he seems well able to cope.  I did a run around the house making sure that he wouldn't have to do any heavy lifting or bending etc.  His village is amazing though - while I was there 2 of his pals dropped by to see how it had gone and several more rang him to chat as well.  I must have heard the same stories about 6 times!!  He has offers of lifts to the hospital and  to the shops so I don't worry too much about him.

I had to leave him on Thursday evening to get back to rehearsals but I knew my sister and her husband were arriving on Friday morning for the weekend. It was at the rehearsals that I got the bad news that the 2 women will almost certainly NOT be able to play their parts as one of their mums is dying.

This is bad news for the panto (as well as for Alison's mum) as she in particular is a fantastic comic actress and really carries the show.  Her timing and her deadpans to the audience are superb.  And her part is pretty huge.  She plays a french lothario sea captain who romances the dame, Sherry Trifle.  The chemistry between her, a woman playing a bloke and the bloke playing Sherry is wonderful.  Now the poor old director is having to learn her part and step in and although he's pretty good, it just won't quite be as funny.  They haven't had the rehearsal time together for one thing.

I'm stepping in for her partner who plays the second-in-command in the Rat Pack.  We are playing the rats as 1920's Noo Yawk gangsters, I'm Deano Martino.  It is not a massive part but very comedic. There is a lot of interplay between the 4 rats and quick lines, not to mention the Noo Yawk accent which I have had to work on as well as learning my lines.  I'm getting there although my accent  is more "slightly camp black drug dealer" than "eye-talian mobster" for some reason.  It works though so it will just have to do!!

I have 4 main scenes and have learned 3 of them this evening as well as getting on top of the accent and the moves.  I will do another few hours on it tomorrow to really nail them and finish off the 4th short scene and hopefully will be off script on Sunday.  Aaaargh - this is scary.

Not only that, I still have to do the camel thing so have to work on the dance routine for that on Sunday as well as, while we can just about follow the moves,we have no idea where we should be on stage and how we are going to avoid treading on the junior chorus!

So, as a result of all this, I did not go with Rich and his dad to Wigan for the footie.  Instead I stayed as home and learned my lines and seriously freaked out the dogs.  They did not like my accent or my ratty moves!  I watched the match on the telly and, although we won, it was rubbish so I did not miss much.

Perhaps as a result of focusing on everything but diet and exercise, I have been good.  No time to cook or eat I suppose.  I went for a run when I was over at Dad's - opened my February account with a brisk 4.7 km - and was rewarded this morning with a glimpse of fresh fat - 16.5!  Wonder if I can hold onto it. I feel as though I might be brewing a sore throat or cough which is truly awful timing so I dosed myself up with a hot toddy this evening INSTEAD OF the piece of Christmas cake I had budgeted for.  Get me with the self- restraint and that.

Canal side run

It's been a couple of weeks since my last lunchtime run in Rotherham and several months since the one before that one. Also I had aborted at least 2 planned runs due to work pressure. So it was very satisfying to get out for a good long run yesterday. The weather was perfect for running: cool but not cold; no wind; nothing worse than a light, misty drizzle. You can't ask for more in January, believe me.

I managed a brisk and even smooth 5.43km taking me to a grand total of 60km in January. I'm VERY pleased with that. 

The selfies below were taken around my turning point at the third lock along. I'm confident that I will be able to run to Sheffield by the time the evenings are light enough later this year. That has been on my "list" of challenges for a few years now.

It was a bit of a sad run at times though. Last time out I met a nice lady out calling for her grandparent's dog Charlie, a lovely old Staffie chap. He had been scared by fireworks the night before and had run off. I advised her on a couple of Lost Dog Facebook pages and watched her search for him over the next 2 weeks. He was found eventually but sadly had drowned in the canal. Poor old Charlie.  Bloody, bloody, inconsiderate fireworks out of season. I hate them. 

Today has been a tough day. A hard day at work, train then bus over to Sheffield for dancing at 6pm, shopping then home for supper and wading through the last, exceedingly crappy, episodes of Silent Witness. I'm really tired so SW is probably all I can manage. I'm also a bit grumpy because Sheffield Wednesday only managed a draw against lowly Bristol City. We went ahead twice and they pegged us back. Very disappointing.

I think as a result of tiredness and having a demanding evening I have eaten quite a bit today. Normal breakfast and lunch but an extra chicken wrap before dancing and then a calorific salmon with noodles and stir fry and sweet chilli dressing. And a couple of glasses of white wine. No regrets cos it's not bad by any means but it's useful to identify danger periods and temptations for future reference.

It's not going to let up any time soon. My dad is having his cataracts done tomorrow (or possibly just one) so I'll be going over to pick him up from hospital and stay with him for a day and a half. I would have stayed longer but with the panto looming I cannot miss rehearsal on Thursday evening. Luckily my sister and her husband are coming over on Friday morning so they'll take over for the weekend. The show must go on and all that.

So - working from home in the morning and hopefully a nice, relaxing run or walk afterwards before heading over to Newark. And now, sleeeeeep!!

Monday morning musings

The scales have very grumpily relented this morning. 2lb off, just. It has been a struggle and I feel as though I have been hovering between 16.6 and 16.8 for AGES. In reality it is only a fortnight but, because I was between those weights before Christmas, it does not feel like "fresh fat". 16.5 WILL be fresh fat and I will be very relieved to see that new number, hopefully very soon.

However, I'm living well, exercising well,  eating and drinking without painful restriction and still dropping weight steadily, although slowly. Surely Shome Mishtake. This is just not me. I seem to be able to make the connection between calories in and out and weight in a way I have never managed before. I'm making choices throughout the day, without resentment, and sticking to them. Day in, day out.  I have stopped looking for miraculous diets where I can eat loads and still drop weight. If I want to eat or drink more I must work more and I still can't do it too often. End of story.

So, I have stopped day dreaming about dropping 4 stone before we go to Australia in December and now expect the drop to be more modest- 2, 2.5 stone would be marvellous. But in doing so I will also be a lot fitter from all the running so I might LOOK as though I have dropped more.

The running is going great guns. I have streaked past 50km in January, am already up to 54.6km and am hoping to fit in a run this lunchtime. 

The pics below are from my dog free trot yesterday morning. It ended up quite gloomy so I felt blessed to have had some sunshine and have seen that amazing skyscape at the bottom.

In other news the Panto is getting very close. I was feeling confident as I had learned my lines and most of my songs. Then the director dropped a bombshell - could I understudy quite a big part as the actress playing it has family troubles (a dying relative I think) and might not be able to make one or more performances. She is very experienced in physical acting and comedy and the part has lots of lines, scenes, comedy and songs. Gonna be a big ask but what can you do?? Line learning for me!!

The importance of tummy rubs

I caught Minty being all cuddly with her daddy. What a spoilt brat eh? 

It's all about the belly for Minty. She would be happy to have her tummy rubbed for hours on end but she doesn't usually roll onto her back for so long so this was a proper belly rub.

Obviously a good belly rub deserves some love in return so there were kisses and attempted kisses.

Don't worry about Shelagh BTW. She gets more than her fair share of attention.

Hanging on

The scales have grudgingly given me back one of the regained lbs so I've been on 16.7 for a few days now.  I'm hopeful of a little better drop than that but I'd take even the one off, pretty please....

Work is equally grudging but not giving an inch. I'm struggling to keep anywhere near on top of my workload which is beginning to take its toll.  A new locum started yesterday (which required a day of babysitting from me) so I'm hoping that there's light at the end of the tunnel.  I know things must be bad though as one of my colleagues, who is usually the very definition of stoicism, started snapping yesterday.  I know it sounds mean, but I was quite pleased as maybe people will take notice and actually DO something about this.

Morale in our team is pretty low.  We are very much the "Cinderella" team in our department with all the attention and recruitment going to Child Protection.  We just found out that they are to recruit 6 or 7 additional solicitors and, to assist with this task, they are going to be paying them a supplement on the scale pay of 10%!  So, not only will that team be properly staffed, they will also be earning 10% more than me.

I  know that Child Protection is completely important but this does not help with the feeling of being taken for granted and undervalued.  We had a meeting with our relatively new manager and expressed these feeling to him (and credit to him he made his case well and listened well).  His solution is another Peer Review of our team and clients in this hope that this will persuade the powers that be to staff us properly and possibly pay us properly.  This will take time but he's probably right - no-one listens to us - but they might listen to an external Peer Review.

I've decided to take on management anyway and put in for a re-grade.  I'm sick and tired of doing the job of a manager, being the most experienced property solicitor in the Council and therefore having to take on anything even vaguely complicated and attend strategic meetings etc but being paid as a foot soldier.  I can't bear this sort of thing but I came to the view that, if I don't value myself, who will?

I took part in a Peer Review of another team recently and the barrister interviewing me was visibly shocked when I told her what I do for no additional pay.  She also showed me comments about me from senior managers in several teams which were all glowing so this gave me some confidence to go for it.

Anyway, thanks for listening to my work woes.

The positive thing about all this is that I'm managing to keep some semblance of work/life balance. I have struggled in the past, during periods of work strife, to keep up with exercise and sensible eating but this time I am doing it.  Runs, walks, lunch time walks when I'm in the office and no comfort eating either.

I've been for 2 runs this week leaving me  less than 2km short of my 50km target for January so I'm going to try to knock that off tomorrow.

Today we played golf!!  Yay! It was a grey, drizzly and chilly day but not terrible by any means. It was a team of 3 so I played with Rich and our pal John.  We started off really well but subsided somewhat in the middle so our score, while respectable, will probably not trouble the leaders.  But it was great to be out and I played some nice shots which is always pleasing.

I then sat in the conservatory and counted birds for the RSPB Big Garden Birdwatch. The results were fairly unsurprising- loads of sparrows, goldfinches, chaffinches, jackdaws and pigeons.  A healthy band of blackbirds, starlings, robins, blue tits and coal tits but NO greenfinches sadly as they have gone into sharp decline over this last few years. We also had a flurry of excitement in the first few minutes of the hour when a sparrowhawk swooped in and out around the feeders. I couldn't see if it took one of the little birds but it could have done!!

Just because we've been out for a hilly walk all morning, this did not excuse us from dog walking duties so we went out again this afternoon for more hills.  It has been most satisfactory - over 20,000 steps and over 100 flights of stairs.  That is a LOT of extra calories so I think I'll have a couple of glasses of wine this evening!!  Have a great weekend everyone!

See how gloomy it was on the golf course!

But it brightened up a little for our walk round the village.

Good days

It's annoying when the scales don't descend in a linear manner. Disappointing results can be disheartening and I admit that after Monday's weigh in, I was, momentarily, disheartened. I had had a good week and then, nothing. 

However, I know that I have taken in over 4,500 calories less than I burned and have been for 3 runs and 3 decent walks so I know that, if I keep doing what I'm doing, the weight will come off. It's that old dieter's maxim - knowledge is power and my Fitbit is the perfect means by which to acquire knowledge.

Also, what Seren said, weighing daily, as long as you can ignore the odd anomaly, does show a direction of travel. I know that mine is a downward direction. At the end of November I peaked at 17.6 and for 2 days of last week I hit 16.6 so that is an irrefutable drop. 

I just need to keep the faith and keep on doing what I'm doing. It will come. 

So, enough of the over-dramatising a minor setback and on with sensible eating and exercising. I had good days yesterday and today - yesterday 15,000 steps and 90 minutes of dancing and today I went for a 4.5km hilly run. 

Food has been modest too so I was able to enjoy a slice of Christmas cake this evening. I always prefer Christmas cake in January and February. Never fancy it at Christmas - maybe I'm not hungry enough for the richness of it and there is so much other contraband around. But in January the odd skinny slice is just a taste of heaven. 

Our run was challenging today. I chose a new route around Bradwell, one we would normally walk rather than run. It was way more hilly than my current routes but I kept up a reasonable pace and made it through only a little knackered. 

Right at the end of our run the sun peeked through the icy gloom so I stopped for a few snaps. Can you tell that I'm a bit tired??

The power of finger crossing failed.

My weight has bobbed up from 16.6 to 16.8 on weigh in morning. Truly a shattering blow. I may change weigh in morning to Tuesday as Mondays often seem to let me down.

Grrrr....