Developing 33

Bit of a quiet day overall. Head down at work and plowed through a fair bit. I had my trials and tribulations to cope with though: it was Lyn's birthday so that entailed sausage rolls, pork pies, chocolate cake, quiche, tarts etc etc all sitting on the table to my left for most of the day and a constant stream of greedy guts colleagues chowing down too. Then Dave was leaving and he ordered 2 monstrous platters of mini pizzas from a local Italian restaurant. Now that really was too much! I loooove pizza, especially proper Italian pizza and these looked and smelled gorgeous!

So, all in all, it was pretty tricky to avoid food today and I needed a fair bit of willpower. I don't know how you lot who don't tell anyone you're on LL cope? At least all my colleagues know that I can't eat and, as well as teasing me, they also keep an eye out that I'm not tempted. I'm sure if people didn't know they'd be asking why I wasn't partaking of such scrummy fare and leaving little offerngs on my desk.

Which leads me to Vicki. She's a woman I sit next to who is recently back from having a baby. She and I were a similar weight before she got pregnant although I'd guess that I was slightly smaller and certainly carried the weight better and did more exercise. Since she's come back from her maternity leave she has definitely gained quite a bit (understandably). She was obviously very interested in LL when she first got back but I don't think she's going to go for it. I know it must hurt her somehow seeing me having lost so much weight. Not in a nasty way but in that way you have that at least there's someone else in the same boat - well, now she's lost that.

I can see in her all the downfalls of great weight that I used to live with daily - how slowly she walks, her limited clothes shopping, her wheezing after even a short walk ino town. That was me (well, nearly!) but somehow she isn't inspired to go for it!! What can you do? Nothing...

I can also see how her being fat affects the way other treat her. Since she left on maternity, 3 young lads have joined her department. They're all fresh out of Uni and are trainee surveyors like Vicki. They're only a few years younger than her (23 to her 28) but about 14 years younger than me. Yet, they all have a laugh and a joke with me and don't interact with Vicki much at all. It's as though she's in the Mummy camp and much much older than them, even though she's only about 28. I'm sure her weight has a lot to do with it as they all have a laugh with other (slim) young Mums in the department. You know what lads are like, they're not nasty or anything just seem to have written her off.

She ate quite a bit today and I just kept thinking - "that was me!". I'm so glad I'm not eating and not wheezing and have made the change for good. I really wish Vicki would too but it has to be her choice...

I had personal training again this evening. He really rang the changes tonight and I did a whole hour's worth of new exercises. Some of them were really challenging involving balance and doing daft things like standing on one leg and stretching up in the air and then down to touch the floor (harder than it sounds!). It was great. I'm glad he listened to me when I said I like variety. It keeps everything fresh and makes me feel that I'm developing. Not only that we did quite a few things that, with my fatgirl head on, I would have been quite scared of Sprinting intervals on the treadmill. I mean really pounding and lifting my knees for a full minute at a time before reducing to a brisk walk for a minute and then repeating. I can't remember when I last ran that fast. High step ups - the enemy of the fat. I did it without major difficulty. It's a brave new world as I think I've mentioned a few times before!!

Then home and cleaned the damn car! Well, washed the outside and hoovered the interior but balked at polishing the leather and the dash so will finish taht tomorrow. I have been shamed into it by the thought that I've got to pick up my mate Jim (footie buddy) tomorrow morning and take him to Headingley for the first day of the Second Test against the West Indies! Yay - a day at the cricket with me mate!! Should be a laugh. I haven't been to a cricket match for years so am quite excited. Hope the weather is good. Jim asked me today by email whether I was still on the "no-food-no-drink-no-fun" diet?? I said I was and would he like a lift to and from Leeds which shut him up pretty rapidly!!!

No doubt I'll get the next instalment of his tortuous lovelife which should take us 'til lunch at least...

I'll take my cmera and see what i can see too. I've no idea what to wear as I think the weather is set to be changeable so layers it is. But, I'm not blessed with many clothes at the moment (you know what it's like) so I'll not be the soignee chick I was hoping to be. What happens if the TV cameras catch me?? Shall I wear a Monty Panesar headscarf of paint a little St Georges flag on my cheeks?? Probably not, but I might....

Have a good day tomorrow bloggers and watch out for me on the highlights show!!