Diet vs hangover!

I know I know. I'm on a VCLD so should not be able to have a hangover but my friends were up from London for a visit and I fancied a break.

We went to Castleton which is a lovely picturesque village a few miles from where I live. It was a really cold and frosty afternoon and the village is decked out with loads of Christmas Trees and lights for the tourists so it felt like it was the embodiment of the Christmassy spirit. Very nice just trotting round the little lanes and popping into the shops selling tourist stuff. But of course, after a hours or so of that, thoughts turn to the pub. So, mulled wine (although I managed to turn down the free mince pie!) followed by a winter warming meal and then more wine and assorted drinks. All this topped off by a birthday party complete with disco and much dancing!

I was quite restrained on the food selection, didn't visit the buffet at the birthday party and kept off the more fattening drinks but I was most definitely NOT on a diet yesterday.

Still, I had a great time and it was good to see my pals and have a lark around. I'm back on the wagon today so hopefuly it won't spoil my week too much. Just slow me down a bit.

Today has been good too. The hangover is not bad at all so we've been for a crisp and frosty walk with the dogs and, once the Londoners left to get back to the big bad city, I headed into the garden to do more tidying up and raking of the last leaves. Only an hour or so but I felt very virtuous. I have also potted up some herbs before they get killed by the frost so I have those on my window sill looking fresh and green and making the kitchen smell nice. Domestic Goddess or what!

I haven't made my Christmas cake yet though....marks off on the Goddess-O-Meter there....tut tut

Hope you've all had a great weekend and are going to have a good diet week too. Sending much love to Mrs L and her poor sick pets (and husband too!). I thinking of you sweets. xxx

I. AM. NOT. HUNGRY!!

Minty in the frosty fields this morning. I did go out but for a walk with D and the dogs not a run. I wanted to take some piccies and it was beautiful but quite tricky with the low sun.

Minty barking at ducks on the river and Shelagh just doin' her thaang...

The heavenly view towards Hathersage.

So, why do I keep wandering into the kitchen for a look around?? Tell me that!

It's very annoying.

I must want something but it can't be food because I know I'm not hungry. All this "wandering" business achieves is a feeling of deprivation and dissatisfaction.

I also feel quite proud as I have managed to resist. The worst I've done was to take a piece of flabby white bread from the crock (D's not mine, I wouldn't buy that crap) and actually eating a single bite before smushing it into a lump in my fist and throwing it away. After that, I made a cup of tea and then came up here to blog while my bath is running.

I think it must be that time of the month when I usually hit the carbs because I'm feeling quite fat too which is the other sign.

Grrrr....anyway, I'm going up to the pub after my bath so that should distract me.

The beach

The Lion's Head (on the left) and the Twelve Apostle (on the right).

D in contemplative mood on Clifton Beach.

Clifton Beach , well, durr.....

Me gritting my teeth against the biting shards of sand being blasted into my bare legs.

I just spouted off on Mrs L's blog about being positive and how, this time, it has really helped me to draw a line under why I gained and how much I gained and just focus on the desired result.

So, that's what I'm doing. Trying to make choices and focus on what I'm going for, ie. being slim and fit again and getting back into those lovely size 12 and 14 clothes which are currently clogging up my wardrobe!

Hopefully the pictures of the gorgeous Clifton beach near Cape Town above will inspire me too. It was too windy to even think about swimming then (the sand was whipping into my bare legs and really hurting!) but I want to be able to think about beaches and cossies next summer!! I mean it!

Weigh in this evening...

Update: I really enjoyed the weigh in last night. I had a modest but reasonable loss (sorry - remember my no numbers rule this time round!) but wasn't disheartened. Everything counts and I'm heading in the right direction. The key thing is to keep going to class, to keep plugging away at the regime and to keep making positive choices.

I fought off the post-class eat-something urge when I got home too although I admit to having an extra pack which I think is the lesser of many evils.

The exercise we did was to write a letter or instructions to someone taking over our body for a few weeks. Like an owner's manual or instructions for looking after a pet except we were talking about our own body. It was quite revealing. Most people said, make sure "she" gets lots of rest, eats healthily etc and I was more about making sure that "she" keeps active, blogs, goes out, exercises, socialises. So it told me my that my worst times, the danger zone, is when I'm sitting on the sofa at home. Obviously that's nice to do once in a while, but not every night.

With D working away a lot, there is a danger that I could become introverted and stay in every night (mostly through choice - there's usually something I can do) but I need to fight against that as those are the times when I'm more likely to succumb to boredom and solace eating. Ho hum.

I also told this mythical guardian to make sure that I get out for some exercise "she make not want to go, but she'll enjoy it when she gets out there!" So now, as I sit here, on a day off, I really have no excuse for not getting out into the frosty morn for a gentle jog/walk. Grrrr, hoist by my own petard (whatever the hell that may be).

Byeee

Making good choices

No trip to Cape Town would be complete without a trip up Table Mountain. We were surprised how often the cable cars weren't running because of wind or fog but we got up there on a very changeable day, sunny one minute and foggy and freezing the next. Still, gorgeous views and lovely flora and fauna.

The island to the right of me is Robben Island where Nelson Mandela was held for all those years. We didn't make it out there as you had to book in advance and we weren't organised enough but we'll go next time...

The view of Clifton beach (I'll post some pictures from the beach later).

Diarmuid looking cold and wondering whether we should go for a walk after all considering the fog closing in. We did but only an hour or so, it really was chilly and once you left the crowds behind, a bit eerie.

Yesterday (Tuesday) was a pretty good day. I got back to the proper regime mindset and I did some exercise. Sunday and Monday I had gone back onto the diet but been a bit "loose" about it. I'd had logistical difficulties (meetings and the quiz) and had taken the easy way out. Not eaten masses or bad stuff but not been stellar in my approach either. Yesterday I was back to normal and turned down some opportunities to eat and drink off plan.

I also did my personal training in the morning so feel a bit more lively.

This is good. I can feel my old hunger to get slim returning. It's not just "ah damn, I've put some weight back on, I need to shift it." It's more "I want to get back into my size 12's and 14's again and feel fit and go running without hurting." It's a more positive aim rather than an undoing a negative. Much easier to focus on too.

I've packed my swimming kit for work so, barring unforeseen meetings (of which I seem to have loads at the moment) I should be ble to do 50 lengths at lunchtime.

I need to take the good times when I can as D is home now too. He managed to get an early chopper yesterday so returned a couple of days early which was nice. The downside is that there is now food in the house, sigh. Also, I have a friend visiting from London at the weekend which will necessitate hospitality. I'm going to try and be restrained and only deviate for very special and nice things but I'm not planning on being a saint!

This time is definitely different to before. I'm not aiming for perfect abstinence, just reasonably speedy reducing. This has two added benefits. One, there's a chance I'll stick to it! And two, I'm having to make choices throughout the diet rather than just at the end so I'm hoping the transition to maintenance/management will be smoother.

Right off to work now. Hope you're all doing well. It's a bit quiet round here these day isn't it?

Determination

I really do feel that this time it IS different. Although I wasn't not strictly on plan over the weekend, there was no feeling of out of control eating. And it was not difficult to get back on the wagon on Sunday (none of this waiting-til-Monday business either!).

This time, I'm not expecting to be perfect but I'm making more choices as I go along. Hopefully this time, I will stick to it better and make the transition to maintaining better too because of all the choices.

I've learned that there is no magic on/off switch when sucess has been attained, it's still a process, but I do feel that I'm further along with the process than I was before.

Sometimes, when you feel fat and horrid, it's easy to think that you've actually gone backwards but I know I'm a different person and have made great strides. I would certainly never regret what I did last year and this and I'd never go back.

Now, just to cement the exercise back into my routine and everything will be fine!!!

Progress and patterns.

Me around my thinnest last summer. I love the flat tummy and slim arms.

Me as I am now give or take a lb or so. Not too bad but getting chunkier and the tummy and arms showing the strain.

Me as I was at my heaviest. Nuff said.

Well, the old pattern is beginning to assert itself. I do well, stick to the regime and then experience some sucess. I feel thinner and a little fitter and then I start to relax and stray from the regime before I reach my goals.

Only this time, it is going to be different.

Yesterday, though, I had the day of "relaxation" and, if I were to let it, I might continue to stray from the regime. But I'm not going to let it.

I went to the football and thought I could handle a brief departure from the regime in the form of a couple of pints and a bacon sandwich. It appears that I can't I as I also had some Toblerone when I got home (not too much, threw the rest away once I'd opened the pack) and a tin of tuna with mayo. So, not a massive departure but significant unless I get my act together today.

Which is what I'm doing by posting this first thing.

Next up, I'm going to get out into the garden and rake some leaves and just generally tidy up. Walk the dogs. Then, If I have any more energy, I'll tackle the inside of the house. So, a busy day and I'm NOT going to stray any more.

Send me strong thoughts please.

Ancient wisdom

Me by the river of leopard prints and skinny dippers..

An ancient rambler complete with rucksack...

I liked this one 'cos D looks like a giant next to the little succulent.

Yay. They had fat-bottomed girls 20,000 ago! But did they make the rockin' world go round I wonder??

Towering red sandstone cliffs.

While I was looking through some of the few South African photos I haven't already posted, I spotted these from a walk out in the Cederberg Wilderness. It was a Rock Art Trail on a slightly hippified farm out in the middle of nowhere.

We turned up at the farm place, having driven for well over an hour and seen more baboons than cars, paid our few rand and got our little map and explanation and then set off. According to the visitors book they'd had about 20 people this year so not exactly a booming business but they were nice people and I think they had a few very basic chalets for retreats further down the river. With warnings about not running over the tortoises on the drive (quite difficult to avoid actually) we headed out into the scorching heat and the feeling that no-one was around. It was fantastic.

There 10 sites of ancient rock art painted by the San Bushmen over 20,000 years ago. These were marked on the map and at various points on the ground too (very discreetly). A small number meant you had to spend the next 10 minutes scrabbling round rocks until you found the painting then there was a brief explanantion on the map leaflet to help you decode it. I must admit we didn't find 2 of them and didn't want to scramble around too much in case of snakes or scorpions or sprained ankles.

On our way back we had a cooling dip in the river (no-one around so skinny dipping it was...) and I noticed a set of cat prints on a sandbank. When I described them to a local later he confirmed that they would have been leopard. how cool is that? The leopard must have jumped down from a tree onto the sand bank, padded across the 10 feet or so into the river and then swum to the other side as there were no return prints.

It was glorious to be out in the middle of nowhere. How often can you really feel alone? I love our landscape in England, engineered by humans as it is, but the African bush really spoke to me. I suppose being brought up in West Africa will have left its mark. The Cederbergs were the closest landscape I could remember to the Nigerian bush so I felt very nostalgic. I will be back.

Of diet talk, there is very little. I managed to resist temptation once I got home last night despite a couple of forays into the kitchen looking for "something". Both times, I managed to either take a glass of water or cup of tea and return empty handed. I also distracted myself going through photos for some frames I have bought. It's about time I get some of my piccies up on the wall but there are so many to choose from it is a very time-consuming process.

Well, it's sunny now and I'm going to the football later so I'm going to head out with the dogs asap. Have fun!